Humiliation is a common emotion nowadays. Some people get pleasure with this emotion while others experience it as a negative incident. Humiliation happens when one individual ridicule the other and causes them to feel sub-par. It is a terrible, serious feeling that generally makes profound, long-term impact. Humiliation is not just verbal, but it can be through body gestures and facial expressions. It influences our confidence and makes it difficult for us to reconstruct it later. However, it is said that being sufficiently certain to face such circumstances easily is the key mantra that can save you.
Every individual has a fear of humiliation. Everything we do is to avoid humiliation! We live in a painful relationship to avoid humiliation! We dress properly to avoid humiliation! We eat properly in public to avoid humiliation! We do mask over things to avoid humiliation!
We live in an authentic world so that no one can judge us. What if you feel low? What if you are not able to perform better? What if you feel you are a loser? What if you don’t know how to dress up? What if you are left behind? Can we get over it? Can we move on? All you need to understand is - IT IS OKAY! its okay if you feel low and you are not feeling better! its okay if you feel you are not able to perform better! Humiliation is an ongoing process, and we can’t stop everyone for doing things. It is always advisable to not overthink much, take a pause for settling down and move ahead in life!
Here are few tips that you can follow if you have experienced humiliation:
1. Don’t take it personally- You can-not change everyone’s behaviour and mindset, so it is better to ignore their actions and don’t take it personally
2. Reach out to friends – seek for support in your network and talk to them to feel good.
3. Understand that you are not the only victim- It is important to understand that every individual has faced humiliation in some part of their lives, and it’s not just you who is facing this.
4. Stop Overthinking- Overthinking kills. You can never get any solutions by overthinking about a problem. So, it is better to keep your mind in peace rather than stressing it out.
5. Practice affirmations- Affirmations can do wonders! Whenever you feel negative, full of stress, emotionally disbalanced, hardships the positive affirmations can be a cure to keep you in a good state of mind.
6. Identify the triggers and work on them- Identification and clarification about the triggers is necessary as then only the possible solutions can be brought out.
7. Don’t hide your feelings- Hiding your feelings can boost more negativity. So, it is better to express your feelings and let go of negative thoughts.
8. Get yourself indulged into other activities- Rather than thinking about the problem and feeling bad about it , you should get yourself indulged into other interesting activities such as Journaling down your thoughts, meditation , listening to soft music , relaxation through yoga , spending time with your favourite people etc.
9. Try to avoid humiliating comments- It is always better to not accept the things which you feel are not related to you or if it is hindering you. You should try to avoid such things and change the place immediately so that you are no more a victim of it.
10. Be resilient- You should be keep coming back even after bad experiences and never give up.
11. Don’t immediately strike back- Striking back immediately can make the situation worse for you as well as for others, so avoid giving back immediately. Take a pause, think, and then act.
12. Move On- The best way to come out of negative emotions and thoughts is moving on.
So, from now onwards when someone laughs at you, tease you or embarrass you, just be strong enough to face it and say, “yes I am” and “I am proud of it”. It will be difficult in the beginning to accept it but nothing is impossible and there is no right and wrong.
About the author -
Counseling Psychologist at Kaleidoscope- a unit of Dr Bakshi's Healthcare.