Humility is an attitude is also essentially focussed on others and their wellbeing. Studies in social psychology have found that people who over value themselves present a higher than average tendency towards aggression. These studies also highlight the relationship between humility and the faculty of forgiveness. People who consider themselves superior judge the faults of the others more harshly and consider them to be less forgiven.
Paradoxically, humility promotes strength of character: the humble person makes decisions on the basis of what he believes to be right and sticks by them without concern for his own image or the opinions of others. As the Tibetan saying has it; " Outwardly, he is as gentle as a purring cat; inside, as hard to bend as a Yak's neck." This resolve has nothing to do with obstinacy and stubbornness. It arises from the clear perception of meaningful goal. It is pointless trying to persuade the woods-man with a perfect knowledge of the forest to take the path leading to a cliff.
Humility is a quality in variably found in the sage, who is compared to a tree whose branches heavy with fruit bow to ground. As for the conceited man, he is more like a bare tree whose branches rear up pridefully. Humility is also reflected in body language that lacks all arrogance and ostentation. In my travels with His Holiness the Dalai Lama I have seen with my own eyes the immense humility, imbued with kindness of that Universally revered man. He is always attentive to everyone. One day entering the Hall where a banquet was being held in his honor by the European Parliament, he noticed the cooks who were watching him through a half open door. He headed straight for a tour of their kitchen; he emerged shortly there after telling Parliamentary President and fifteen Vice Presidents: " It smells good!" It was a fine way to break the ice at such a solemn meal.
Westerners are also surprise when they hear great asian scholars and contemplatives say: " I am nothing, I know nothing." They believe it is a question of false modesty or a cultural tic, when the truth is that these sages simply do not think, " I am wise, or " I am an accomplished meditator." There humility does not mean they are not aware of their knowledge and scholarship, but that such learning reveals how much more there is to learn. Once understood this attitude can be touching and even amusing.
