New Ways Of Relationships
In an era where traditional models of relationships and marriage have been the norm, a growing number of people are choosing to embrace singlehood
What if the ‘traditional happily ever after’ is no longer everyone’s dream? Whether by choice or circumstance, more individuals are opting for a life without romantic partners, sparking curiosity and concern.
Is this trend a rejection of traditional relationships, or does it reflect changing values, personal freedom, and evolving social dynamics?
In the past, relationships emphasised social structure, where roles were often predetermined and priorities revolved around duty and collective well-being. Love and personal compatibility were secondary considerations. However, today many individuals view marriage as optional. In a stark study by Morgan Stanley which states around 45 per cent of women aged 25 to 44 are projected to remain single and childless by 2030. This highlights a broader challenge to conventional ideas of womanhood and daily life.
But why are increasing numbers of people single? This rise can be attributed to various factors both circumstantial and by choice.
1. Circumstantial :
● Divorce, Widowhood, Personal decision to avoid the complexities of long-term relationships.
Others adopt unconventional setup such as :
● Staying in different rooms
● Staying legally separated
● Cohabiting as flatmates
● Staying in traditional marriages while leading parallel lives due to incompatibility, sexual mismatch, infidelity or varied interests.
2. Choice :
● Diverse Sexual/ Queer Identities
● Changing mindset of society
● Cohabitation
● One-Person Household
● DINK Syndrome - (Double Income no kid)
● Emphasis on self needs
● Incompatibility for years
Questioning whether one person can meet all emotional needs suggests that traditional romantic partnerships are losing appeal for many.
A 2021 Pew Research Center survey, 47 per cent of US adults are unmarried, a figure steadily increasing in recent decades. Globally similar shifts in attitudes towards singlehood are emerging. Today, many individuals—regardless of age—find meaning and happiness in careers, friendships, personal growth, and hobbies, rather than in romantic relationships.
The modern emphasis on self-actualisation plays a central role in this shift. Many individuals are increasingly prioritising independence, personal growth, and non-traditional lifestyles over romantic relationships. A 2023 study by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that 59 per cent of millennials and 48 per cent of Gen Z adults prioritise personal goals and self-development over traditional relationship milestones compared to 37 per cent of Baby Boomers and 44 per cent of Gen X.
While societal pressures once pushed people to pair off and settle into conventional family structures, today’s generation is redefining what it means to be in a relationship—and what it means to be single.
For younger generations, the desire for independence and autonomy plays a significant role in the decision to remain single. Millennials and Gen Z are embracing the freedom to live life on their own terms, whether through solo travel, focusing on careers, or cultivating non-romantic relationships. A 2022 study by the National Marriage Project found that among adults aged 18-34, the percentage of those choosing to live alone or remain single has doubled in the past 30 years.
The rise of diverse relationship preferences in younger generations such as asexuality, bisexuality, solo polyamory and non- monogamy reflects a growing shift in how people perceive intimacy and connection. These approaches challenge the traditional notion that fulfillment and happiness are tied to monogamous or lifelong romantic partnerships. Instead, they give people the freedom to prioritise their own needs and preferences without being pressured to follow societal norms. For instance, solo polyamory allows individuals to maintain multiple meaningful relationships while prioritising their independence.
Interestingly, the trend extends beyond younger adults. According to a 2023 AARP report, nearly 1 in 5 adults aged 50 and older are living single, a number that has risen over the past decade. In India, divorce rates are also climbing with approximately 1 in 1000 marriages ending in divorce. This shift can be attributed to a variety of factors :
● Individuals in 40s
○ Empty Nest Syndrome - As children leave home, some couples realize that their relationships lacks depth.
○ Traditional Marriage View - They hold more traditional views on marriage which influences their marital satisfaction and decision.
● MILLENNIALS in their 30s
○ Clarity of Desires - Many individuals have a clear understanding of their personal and professional aspirations
○ Reevaluation of Traditional Marriages : Recognition that conventional marital structures may not align with their needs and recognition
○ High Achievers and People Pleasers : The tendency to overextend themselves can lead to burnout, adversely affecting marital relationships.
● Generation Z in their 20s:
○ Rejection of Traditional Gender Roles
○ Diverse Sexual/ Queer Identities
○ Exposure to Western Culture
○ Lack Of Emotional Intelligence Due To Social Media
○ Depleting Quality Of Social Connections
In deeply conditioned, co-dependant societies like India, the emphasis on family over self often leads to emotional stagnation, particularly during the empty nest phase. While one partner may cling to the traditional setup, the other partner may seek freedom and “want out” highlighting a lack of inner support and self-reliance.
Interestingly, studies show that older singles, particularly women, are increasingly rejecting the idea of remarriage, with many preferring the independence and autonomy that single life offers. The older adults who embrace singlehood often experience what is termed post-traumatic growth—a positive psychological change following hardship, such as divorce or the loss of a partner. This growth helps them feel more independence and focus on improving themselves.
These changes in personal choices are unfolding alongside broader demographic shifts. In South Korea, the fertility rates have dropped to an astonishing new low to 0.72 children per woman. This has had huge implications on the societal and economic impact. A declining birth rate results in shrinking and fewer young people entering the workforce, shortage of labor and slowed economic growth. It would also lead to reduced tax avenues and strain on public welfare systems.
Beyond economic concerns, changing family structures are emerging as a critical issue. Rising childlessness and delayed parenthood disrupts traditional caregiving roles, leaving the older generation reliant on formal care systems.
This demographic trend mirrors a global crisis, with aging populations reshaping economies worldwide. In India, the elderly population is expected to soar from 153 million to 347 million by 2050, doubling the dependency burden. This shift risks overwhelming healthcare systems, increasing pension liabilities, and reducing productivity, demanding urgent policy interventions to address both economic and societal impacts.
The fear of commitment and emotional risk is playing a significant role in rising singlehood. High divorce rates, broken relationships, and the emotional toll of long-term partnerships have led many individuals, particularly those in middle age or later, to approach relationships with caution. A 2022 report from the Kinsey Institute found that 65 per cent of respondents hesitated about entering into traditional marriages due to concerns about emotional vulnerability, trust, and the potential for conflict.
But, isn't singlehood lonely? Research indicates that singles often have stronger social connections. A 2023 study by University of Toronto revealed that single individuals have stronger community connections and engage in more social activities as compared to married individuals.
Technology has redefined relationships , with dating apps offering alternatives to traditional relationships. While platforms like Tinder and Bumble were initially popular among younger users, older generations are increasingly using them to explore both casual relationships and deeper connections, without pressure of settling down. A 2021 survey by Match.com found that 40 per cent of singles aged 50 and older were using dating apps, preferring the flexibility and convenience they offer. For younger people, digital dating has helped redefine the notion of relationships, encouraging casual dating, open relationships, and even non-monogamous arrangements.
Technology has contributed to choice overload. With so many potential partners available at the swipe of a finger, individuals may find it harder to commit to one person, often leading them to stay single longer.
In addition, changing attitudes toward marriage and family structures contribute to the rise in singlehood across generations. A 2020 study by the Pew Research Center found that only 42 per cent of U.S. adults said that having children is essential to a fulfilling life, down from 50 per cent a decade earlier. This shift reflects marriage and children are no longer seen as the defining milestones of adulthood. For older adults, particularly Baby Boomers, the decision to stay single may stem from the challenges of caregiving, previous failed marriages, or the desire for personal space and freedom. Meanwhile, younger generations, such as Gen Z, view marriage as just one of many lifestyle options, and opt for alternatives like cohabitation, polyamory, or even single-parenthood without traditional marriage.
Finally, the increasing empowerment of women across all age groups has contributed to the trend toward singlehood. The growing autonomy of women reshapes their identity, allowing them to define success on their terms rather than conforming to traditional gender roles. This empowerment encourages women to seek fulfillment beyond romantic relationships. This trend is particularly evident among well-educated women who feel no need to marry for social acceptance or financial security.
In my own practice, I have observed that the changing face of relationships is due to the increasing prevalence of marital dissatisfaction, infidelity, and unwillingness to compromise which contributes to rising rates of divorce. In today’s fast-paced world, emotional cheating has become highly prevalent because of advancements in social media and digital communication. Social media has made it easier for individuals to seek emotional intimacy outside their relationships. It is not uncommon to see couples who have been together for over 30 years wanting to part ways due to change in goals and preferences. Even younger couples want to file for divorce within a few months of marriage due to unmet emotional needs or perceived incompatibility.
Ultimately, while singlehood is becoming more common, it’s not a rejection of love or companionship but rather a redefinition of how people approach relationships. Across all age groups, individuals are increasingly seeking deeper connections outside of traditional romantic partnerships, whether through friendships, family bonds, or personal growth. This trend reflects a larger cultural shift toward individuality and self-empowerment, where relationships both romantic and non-romantic are increasingly based on personal choice and mutual fulfilment. As attitudes toward marriage, commitment, and independence continue to evolve, it’s clear that the future of relationships will be more diverse and flexible, with many people finding happiness and meaning in ways that don’t necessarily involve traditional partnerships.
