How To Keep Up Relationship Wellness Between Parents And Teens
Teens' relationships with parents and families change during adolescence, but teens need the support of parents and family just as much as they did when they were children.
Being Mindful
More mindful and positive, and less negative parenting behaviours lead to more positive behaviour in children, nurturing compassion, and kindness. Accepting our teens totally, and being non-judgmental, and empathetic make up the foundation of mindful parenting. To be in the moment with them, to accept things the way they are and not how we want them to be.
Acceptance does not necessarily mean approval. It involves approaching each moment with the mentality that "this is as it is." Only from that place can one make a choice to respond, not react.
Being Appreciative
Are we appreciative of our children, of who they are or what they do? Are we able to see their significance, beyond the obvious teen tantrums? Do we make it a habit to express our appreciation?
The most important emotional need of a youngster is to feel valued. It is therefore extremely important to appreciate our children. Unfettered, unconditional appreciation.
Children who have received sufficient appreciation develop into secure adults with healthy self-esteem.
Being Grateful
Are we grateful for our teens?
The troublemakers, the rule-breakers and the rebellion-creators. We cannot ignore them or be angry with them because they see things differently, because, in our opinion, they are round pegs in square holes. Gratitude and acceptance are two sides of the same coin – when one has accepted their teens for who they are, one is grateful and truly happy.
Being Inclusive
Parents ought to participate meaningfully in the lives of their children – develop an open, warm, and inclusive relationship underpinned by respect and trust. An inclusive parenting style leads to children who grow into inclusive adults.
Being Connected
While teens need family support as much as they did when they were younger, they also need more privacy and personal space. The key to finding this balance is to be connected with them by using unplanned, everyday interactions or planned ones to do things together.
Keeping open lines of communication where a child can come and tell us even if they have gone wrong or done awful things, is important. Tackling difficult conversations together fosters a healthy, trusting relationship.
Active listening is a powerful technique that tells the teen: Right now, you are the most important thing to me. This listening without interrupting, judging or correcting strengthens the bonds between the parent and the teen.
Conclusion
There is no right or wrong parenting style. We learn on the job. To get up each morning to carry out acts of kindness and love beyond that what's expected of us or required of us. To help our children find the wonder and the marvel of ordinary life and make it come alive for them; the extraordinary will take care of itself.
The home is a nurturing environment that is committed to developing the child’s potential in a caring, creative and vibrant ambience.
• A place where the teen can build on their strengths and feel successful and safe.
• A place where one can add wings to their life.
• A place where they will make conscious choices to be happy, while we as parents help them be meaningful and mindful members of society.
• A place where MAGIC happens. To be Mindful, Appreciative, Grateful, Inclusive and Connected.
