"I Think It Is For Each Woman Or Man To Decide What Their Respective Standards Of Beauty Are" - Devangana Mishra

1. What does beauty mean to you?

Beauty to me is, 'It's 7:15 am, I have the last minute of my ‘wake up, feed cat, 20 sun salutations, head-stand, brew coffee, shower, get dressed, kiss cat(s) morning routine’, I give myself one last look over in my 12 inches to both ends bathroom mirror, knowing in that moment that besides teaching through the day, I have two important meetings, one by noon at the school I teach, one at another place later that evening with someone who is never met me flowing into a rare meeting with a magazine's publicist who wants me ‘in my truth, in my skin’, then I’m getting a drink with the man I'm dating at the end of my day at 8:30ish pm, with a big ‘ish’ with his time and mood, as always, he also notices every last flaw in my skin that creeps in. There's a possibility I may be in broad daylight with all my pores magnified, every unthreaded hair visible, all seen, easily solved by ‘lunch table women’. Do I still give myself a look-over in that last minute of my morning routine and think, ‘hmm, I look beautiful!’...That is when many women define beauty, I reckon, I think.

2. What are the emotional or physical costs women pay for beauty?

A lot, we are so busy comparing ourselves to one another, wondering do I look like her, do I speak like her, smile like her, is my skin like her, do my hair fall like her, does my forehead have creases, do my cheeks crease as if its wrinkling when I smile, does her husband look at her the way mine looks at me or does hers look at her more lustfully, dutifully, lovingly, what do I need to fix, how do I fix, what about me would make her envious of me, what about me would make me better than her, what about me would entice him more, what about me would flatter my job more, what about me would complement not intimidate, what about me would intimidate, should I buy this, should I use this, should I wear this, should I give up on this, all of these daily should I's and should I not make up a woman's daily life, make her wonder am I beautiful now, and if not, then what else should I do to fix this broken part. 

3. What does it mean to not comply with modern standards of beauty? What are those really?

The usual modern standards of beauty are what we see around us. Perfect eyebrows, a perfect jawline, flat stomachs, poker straight hair, smooth arms and legs, a perfect set of teeth, clean skin that glows, the colour of one's skin has stopped mattering too much I think but then it still does I guess. Thus, I don't know, I really think it is for each woman or man for that matter to decide what their respective standards of beauty are and then, I hate to sound teacher-like, but backward planning from those standards to you. Keeping in mind what is under your control, what is not, what you really can work at, what you just can't be bothered to, these are all modern standards of beauty and what we have got to suffer at all times. 

4. Does the beauty business damage women's mental health? Can you speak more on this?

It really does. This constant knocking thought of how do I plan my day or work life or personal life in a way to support my beauty routine, where do I fit in a workout with kids and a mad house, what else should I spend on my skin, do I have the money to, time to, patience to, will I use it,  will it really matter if I don't thread or tweeze or wax or conceal that pimple or stop caring about my growing double chin or my thinning hairline- these are all thoughts every woman struggles with- even when they may ignore these popping in thoughts with other matters of more importance. 

5. Do different careers hold differing beauty standards, and how do we intervene in those?

They totally do, I love this question. Every career is competitive, every career requires poise or grace or beauty or something about you that someone else won't have, something that'll make you a winning, how does one keep interfering in that rat race to fit in your standards of beauty and stick with those? For an actor, a writer, a manager, a journalist, a publicist, a teacher, an artist, a CEO, an entrepreneur, an activist, a social worker, beauty is important but how one wants their beauty to be seen or known becomes more important and human interference in that is essential otherwise the flood of beauty standards will push us down rather than us pushing the flow. 

6. What is your personal beauty routine?

I rely on a lot of skin oils, almond, marula, neem and basic creams, a retinol at night a few times a week, I wash my face with a facewash, since forever, in the morning I don't wash my face again. I use a gotu kola or a besan-rice flour face pack twice a week on my skin and maybe sit in a steam room for a bit a few times a month. I make sure to do some basic workout everyday, it doesn't matter how busy I may get. 

7. Anything else you would like to share while we're on the topic of beauty?

Look around you, everywhere, at everyone, then peek at yourself in the mirror with thoughts like - do I love myself, does my skin seduce me, does my beauty blind me, even if not a lot, just a little, even if not everyone, just a man who loves me a lot or your best friend. If that is true for you, you are beautiful. Beauty is what you see in the mirror.